hile my ex-husband had helped himself to all he needed and left me with little to show for decades of work, but I emerged from my divorce with something worth far more than goods and chattels - I had “hope”. Hope that I would find happiness in the future. Hope that my trust, compassion, sincerity and friendship would be returned. And finally, hope that I could believe sentiments, words, promises and gestures offered to me, once more. Unfortunately, I learned, in later months, that such “hope” was elusive and tragically short lived for me.
Is this the price one pays for daring to be vulnerable or is it that I am of an endangered delicate species, living in too harsh a world? These questions have plagued me for the last several years. A person with a gentle, trusting nature should not need to wear armour to feel safe. Should a dove be required to don a turtle shell, in order to survive? How could it take flight with such an encumbrance? How could anyone witness the pure beauty of its delicate frame, if it were to be masked by such a shield? Is not “twice burned, forever shy” the same as a bird grounded by armor? What is the consequence?
Once a woman, whose entrance to a room would inexplicably command the attention of all who were present, today one who retreats from public arenas and keeps entirely to herself. A woman, whose eyes used to sparkle with fiery energy and a zest for life, today reflect a deep reserve. Once with so much to contribute, now one whose words are shared with none. Once passionately engaging, today, detached stillness.
I've seen many examples of insensitivity in the past year. Such behaviour has a profound impact - even on people who are intelligent, assured and capable. Courageous and strong-willed, I wore a brave face. But behind that is a most generous and sensitive core. Some might consider this a weakness, a shortcoming, or even worse. I prefer to consider it my "gift". Perhaps such a gift renders me more vulnerable than most and some might declare, “Of what importance is one person lost in a world of billions?”. So true indeed. I am but one inconsequential person.
This story is offered to remind you to exercise due care with each other, in order to prevent another casualty, like me.
Is this the price one pays for daring to be vulnerable or is it that I am of an endangered delicate species, living in too harsh a world? These questions have plagued me for the last several years. A person with a gentle, trusting nature should not need to wear armour to feel safe. Should a dove be required to don a turtle shell, in order to survive? How could it take flight with such an encumbrance? How could anyone witness the pure beauty of its delicate frame, if it were to be masked by such a shield? Is not “twice burned, forever shy” the same as a bird grounded by armor? What is the consequence?
Once a woman, whose entrance to a room would inexplicably command the attention of all who were present, today one who retreats from public arenas and keeps entirely to herself. A woman, whose eyes used to sparkle with fiery energy and a zest for life, today reflect a deep reserve. Once with so much to contribute, now one whose words are shared with none. Once passionately engaging, today, detached stillness.
I've seen many examples of insensitivity in the past year. Such behaviour has a profound impact - even on people who are intelligent, assured and capable. Courageous and strong-willed, I wore a brave face. But behind that is a most generous and sensitive core. Some might consider this a weakness, a shortcoming, or even worse. I prefer to consider it my "gift". Perhaps such a gift renders me more vulnerable than most and some might declare, “Of what importance is one person lost in a world of billions?”. So true indeed. I am but one inconsequential person.
This story is offered to remind you to exercise due care with each other, in order to prevent another casualty, like me.
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