ctually, I'd be less than honest if I didn't admit that it hurt deeply to receive that short and very pointed email from Doug. When visiting ILW later that day, I'd see something that would both shock me and serve to provide a possible reason for his cool behaviour with me. Doug's Yahoo chat ID name was different from the moniker he'd used posting on ILW. Only those that had chatted with him would know his Yahoo messenger identity, and yet, there on ILW was a post purportedly made in that name querying an immigration issue that seemed to be similar to the circumstances that surrounded my marriage to an alien. I knew that he had no immigration concern, so I knew he didn't make that post, but that meant it could only have been made by someone who was familiar with his Yahoo identity.
Was it entirely possible that someone wished to discredit him, or, even worse make it appear as if it was I that was making a mockery of him? Why would anyone wish to do something like this?
I dashed off an email to him, explaining that I appreciated our relationship and valued the honesty we'd shared, and would never resort to place that in jeopardy, hoping that he'd know enough of me to believe it. In the month of contact and more than 400 hours of chatting, I'd shared many personal details of my life and family that I would never share with anyone else. Details that were not for public knowledge and facts that my family would never conscion mentioning to anyone else. In turn, Doug had shared with me similar information about his circumstances that was confidential and it was this innate respect for each other that was one element of the deep bond that had developed between us. I hoped he would recognise my loyalty to that bond.
An email from him that arrived later that same day would confirm that he did acknowledge those qualities in me, but the drama that was developing on the ILW message board was concerning and he didn't know whom he could trust. Betrayal causes us to question many things, understandably so.
With the good man anger is quick to die.
We'd chat later that night and for the first time in a week or more our conversations returned to their typical warm and carefree discourse. It danced from one topic to the next; when serious, it was intellectual, anecdotal and factual; when not, it was filled with witty quips, double entendres and laced with laissez-faire sexual energy. Chatting with Doug was effortless, enjoyable and we seemed to 'click' on so many planes.
Was it entirely possible that someone wished to discredit him, or, even worse make it appear as if it was I that was making a mockery of him? Why would anyone wish to do something like this?
I dashed off an email to him, explaining that I appreciated our relationship and valued the honesty we'd shared, and would never resort to place that in jeopardy, hoping that he'd know enough of me to believe it. In the month of contact and more than 400 hours of chatting, I'd shared many personal details of my life and family that I would never share with anyone else. Details that were not for public knowledge and facts that my family would never conscion mentioning to anyone else. In turn, Doug had shared with me similar information about his circumstances that was confidential and it was this innate respect for each other that was one element of the deep bond that had developed between us. I hoped he would recognise my loyalty to that bond.
An email from him that arrived later that same day would confirm that he did acknowledge those qualities in me, but the drama that was developing on the ILW message board was concerning and he didn't know whom he could trust. Betrayal causes us to question many things, understandably so.
With the good man anger is quick to die.
We'd chat later that night and for the first time in a week or more our conversations returned to their typical warm and carefree discourse. It danced from one topic to the next; when serious, it was intellectual, anecdotal and factual; when not, it was filled with witty quips, double entendres and laced with laissez-faire sexual energy. Chatting with Doug was effortless, enjoyable and we seemed to 'click' on so many planes.
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